In the Bleak Mid-winter

The sky has been particularly interesting today. Every once and awhile the sun peaks out from behind the clouds. The clouds themselves keep changing shape and color as well. Right now the sky is blue with a few clouds sparsely throughout the view. The sun is shining. The trees are what trees should look like in the winter. Bare and full of snow. Yesterday it reached 45 degrees fahrenheit up in Northeastern Wisconsin and it rained. Overnight it all froze and the snow stuck to the branches and have been stuck all afternoon. Lots of people complain about the cold and ice and snow, but it is perfect. I couldn’t imagine spending an entire winter without the snow. It is a foreign concept. I spent the Christmases of 1996, 2004, and 2007 in Florida with my Grandparents. It is lovely going down to see them and a nice break from the cold, but I couldn’t stay away from the cold all winter long. Maybe someday. But right now, I’m loving the 27 degree weather. That’s what long underwear is for. And hats and gloves and scarves and coats. Once you know how to effectively layer, winter is a breeze.

Changes in Layout

The layout has changed! (Obviously.)

The picture is one of my own from last year. It is a view of my desk in the house I inhabited during my junior year of college. If I decide to keep this type of layout I may change the picture every once and awhile.

These changes are coinciding with other changes I am hoping to make during my final winter break from school. There are the usual resolutions of eating healthier, working out more often, studying in a timely manner, and staying organized. Which pretty much covers it!

2009 is the year I officially become an adult. I graduate soon and will be indepedent of my parents. I don’t have a clear life plan or anything, which is perfect. Life takes a person in strange directions. I’d hate to disappoint myself by setting high, unrealistic expectations and timelines for a life that will be completely different years down the road. Change is important to me.

Christmas Thoughts

It’s been awhile since my last post. I finished my second to last semester of college with relative ease. I have all of my grades back and they are better than I thought they would be (and even hoped they would be) which is fantastic! I made it home driving by myself with no incidents on the road, despite the fact that it has been snowing every other day (and sometimes everyday) up here in the midwest. Do you want to know a  secret? I LOVE IT! And I think everyone that complains about this should move elsewhere. Because let’s face it. It gets cold here in the winter and…it snows! Wow, who knew? Stop acting so surprised every year when it happens! Thanks.

Christmas has been over for just over two hours now and I should really think about going to sleep soon. Now that the semester is completely finished for me and I have my grades back, in theory I shouldn’t be worried about anything for awhile. But unfortunately, I find other things to occupy my mind. The economy isn’t helping anyone, that’s for sure. It’s mildly terrifying actually. I usually am able to work with my Dad’s company during winter break, but they aren’t hiring any college students this year. Which throws a wrench into my budget plans. Plus the fact that every other day (okay, every day) the news reports more and more job cuts at more and more companies. I graduate in less than five months. What then? But that is in the future. Near future.

There are several things I have the potential to worry about right now. Money, weight, jobs, my teeth, health insurance, graduating, gpa, the inability to afford a vehicle, to downgrade to basic cable or not, and the list doesn’t end there! My goal this week is to get organized (starting with my room here at my parent’s house) and reflect on this past year and attempt to stop worrying about what could happen and focus on the good things that have been happening. One thing I’d like to accomplish is to start telling stories on my posts better.

Here’s to a peaceful Holiday Season.

George Eliot, I hardly knew ya…

I finished my senior paper and it is turned in to the English office! I went to sleep between 5:30 and 6 this morning and woke up again shortly after 8 so I could run it over and turn it in. I literally pulled jeans and my coat and boots on and walked to the bus stop. I almost fell asleep on the shoulder of the woman next to me on the bus! It was kind of ridiculous. But I went to the English Undergraduate Office, turned in my paper (with a self-addressed stamped envelope so I can get it back) and I am officially done with my Senior Seminar and paper!! Hopefully I didn’t completely fail! I sat on the couch in the living room for over 14 hours working on revising that thing! I made it through the entire first season of “Friends” and everything!

It feels really nice that I am finished with half of my classes. Tomorrow morning at 10:30 I take my Nazi History final and then I need to work on my final Brit Lit paper that is due on Monday between 3 and 4:45. After that, I officially have one semester of college remaining! I’m really looking forward to getting home for break. Now that things are winding down here school-wise (finally) and our house is all decorated for Christmas and I’m getting my Holiday cards written and there is lots of snow on the ground already…it’s starting to feel like the Season is upon us!

It’s strange to think that a week ago from this very moment I arrived in Antigo for Grandma’s funeral. For about ten minutes last Thursday I was considering not going and staying in the cities to do homework for finals. Then I realized what an idiot I would have been to skip my Grandma’s funeral in favor of doing school work that most likely would not have been done anyway. Last Friday night was nice. I spent a lot of time with my aunts and uncles last weekend and I feel as though I was able to get to know them better. It’s not everyday one goes bar hopping with the aunts and uncles in Antigo, Wisconsin. I’m really looking forward to seeing everyone again on Christmas Day. It’ll be another bittersweet moment, sure, but spending time with family is the most important thing right now. Which is why I am so excited to go home Tuesday.

Finals?

I have been sitting on the couch in my living room for almost ten hours. Since Wednesday was the last day of class, today was spent turning in my final portfolio for technical writing, buying stamps for my Christmas cards, watching way too many episodes of season one of Friends, and sitting on the couch trying to revise my senior paper. The latest I can turn it in is ten o’clock Friday morning. Which means I need to be finished with this thing in about 8 hours in order to make it. Because all I have to do Friday is turn in this paper, I can come home and sleep the rest of the day. But, I do have to study for my history final which is at 10:30 on Saturday morning. (I know, finals on a Saturday morning? What’s up with that?) After that exam is over I need to start on my Brit Lit paper which I need to turn in between 3 and 4:45 on Monday afternoon. Hopefully Tuesday’s weather is good so I can drive home! I’m ready for a break. I’m starting to get into the Christmas spirit since a couple of my roommates decorated our house yesterday. Our house has two living rooms and both are covered in lights. There’s something about sitting in one’s house at night by the light of Christmas lights. (Or Holiday lights, whatever you celebrate.) Well, I do need to get back to this paper. It needs to be turned in whether I finish it completely or not.

This week.

So far, today has been alright. No tears! -Yet. I went to my Nazi History class this morning for the second to last lecture. Then I called my parents (because these days it helps to talk to the two of them as much as I can) and decided to take this week off from work. I only have been working 11 hours a week this semester so I’m not losing out on a lot of money, but it is more important for me to focus on my school work. I’ll be completely finished on Saturday, which is nice except for the fact that I have to actually finish everything in five days. So hopefully today I can finish up all of my technical writing assignments, tomorrow I’ll write my Brit Lit paper, Wednesday I’ll do my Senior paper draft and Thursday and Friday I’ll study for my history class. In theory it should all work out, but in practice…we’ll see.

Snow.

If you look closely, there is snow falling in the background of this blog. I thought it would be appropriate because I have a new perspective on snowfall. On Saturday, after the funeral service for my Grandma the most beautiful snowfall occurred. Right before the funeral directors opened the doors for the pallbearers, one asked, “Did Betty like snow?” which confused everyone until they opened the doors and the near white out blizzard appeared. The flakes were big and the snow was falling so softly, it had to be a sign. The same thing happened on Thursday right after I found out the news from my Dad. I was sitting in class and looked out the window to see a brief heavy snowfall. Now I believe every time I see a snowfall like those I will think of Grandma and very likely shed a tear or two. I know she’s in a better place now, but it is still a difficult time. I am trying to get through my last week of the semester with all my final papers, projects and exams. I’ll have 5 weeks off this year and no consistent job working for my Dad over break, so I’ll have lots of free time it turns out. Christmas will be different this year. I have a feeling “Silent Night” will make the tears fall for real this year. (That song usually gets me to choke up a little each Christmas Eve, but this year they’ll be streaming down.) I know we’ll all be okay in time, but her memory will live on in the snow, every time I open a new book, and in our hearts. I miss you Grandma.

Dear Grandma O’Brien,

My Dad told me you went Home today. I write this with a heavy heart, but I know things are better up there. I’d like to think I acquired my extreme love of reading from you, which I am ever thankful for. There are so many things I will fondly remember always, beginning with the rolls you made for Thanksgiving dinners. I also remember when I was younger and we would make the often ten hour trek across two states to visit (at least four times a year) and arrive after ten o’clock at your house. When discussing where we were going to sleep, you mentioned the davenport, which in my seven year old mind was a secret outdoor porch of some sort that scared me to death! (Okay, maybe saying “scared me to death” is too much too soon.) Turns out, it was just the couch. I think you’d be proud of me today. Two hours after I heard the news I had to give my presentation on my senior paper. Only the most important paper of my life thus far. I made it through without bursting into tears, which was difficult, but I did it. There was a moment during that class this morning when I looked out the windows to see the snow falling heavily for a moment. It was followed by a ray of sunlight breaking through the clouds and light flurries, which I took to be a sign from heaven. I love you, I’ll miss you, and I’ll never forget you. Say hi to Grandpa up there for me.

Love, Megan

Best news ever!

Well, maybe not ever, but still fantastic!

I had my British Lit class this evening and Madhurima, our instructor informed us that she’ll give us the option to take the final exam only if we WANT to! If we decide not to take the final, she said she’ll just take the grade we received on our midterm and apply the same to the final exam grade. Well, I got an A on the midterm so why would I wait until the 15th to take my last scheduled final? This means I will be finished on Saturday the 13th at noon, which is the earliest I have ever been done with finals before! Now I am thinking I’ll head home on the 14th rather than waiting until the 17th like originally planned. I haven’t decided for sure yet though. It depends on whether or not I feel ready to go home. I have a car here for a couple weeks so I can go home earlier than Doug on the 22nd.

So, with the whole ending school two days early business, this means I have TEN days remaining until the end of the semester! For the rest of the week (tomorrow) I have to give my presentation on my senior project, which is not a big deal really. We don’t have to stand up in front of the class or anything. We sit in a circle for class for the seminar anyway, so basically I’m just talking about what I have planned for the paper curretly and explain it a bit and ask if anyone has questions or comments. I think it helps us more than anything to get outside opinions on our topics. I also need to finish up writing comments on the two papers I have to review. Peer review is a big part of the English program. It’s always interesting to read what other people are writing. It helps me a lot in terms of my own writing I’d like to believe.

I have a lot to do this weekend. I need to finish reading White Teeth, get a good start on my final Brit Lit paper, and write up my feasibility report for technical writing along with the PowerPoint presentation on that project. I also need to put together a portfolio of all my work that I’ve done for tech writing. Soon enough, I’ll have time to relax. I think I am mostly excited to be able to read what I want to read for a month. Although I may read Brothers Karamazov in anticipation of the Dostoevsky class I registered for in the spring. What I should have read this summer were the books I read for my senior seminar this semester. But I think I should go for the lightest, fluffiest read I can imagine. Maybe I’ll re-read Twilight. (hahaha…)